Am I right?
Though cliché and somewhat repetitive, there’s always a personal twist to the universally cringe-worthy phrase, “You know it’s a Monday morning when…”
So, without further ado, here’s my uncaffeinated version:
You know it’s a Monday morning when…
- You make breakfast for two kids in one pan because you’re running terribly late after having enjoyed non-farmer’s hours during the weekend. Breakfast consists of two scrambled eggs on one side of the pan and one semi-scrambled, burnt omelet on the other.
- Your coffee… well, there’s no time for that.
- You slice your thumb on the way-too-sharp-to-hand wash blade of the very smoothie maker that’s supposed to help you concoct things to make you healthy, happy and whole.
- You glance back in your review mirror as you drive out of the neighborhood, only to observe one kid eating a piece of burnt toast with a dollop of butter on top (because who has time to spread that?) and the other slurping down “Best By [TODAY]” yogurt from a styrofoam cup, the remnants of which will probably live in your backseat until they turn into something acceptable for the school’s science fair this coming fall.
- Your eyelids feel like they weigh 10 lbs. because, well, see #2.
- SIX?! Isn’t five enough?! Go have some coffee! You know it's a Monday morning, for Pete’s sake!