A Mom's 12 Days of Christmas

A few years back, I set out to come up with yet another rendition of the 12 Days of Christmas.  This particular version of an overly-reinvented song was the culmination of many a few painstaking hours of friendly interrogation, insider scooping and just some good old-fashioned nosing over coffee into my girlfriends' lives.

Of course, the mommies with whom I spoke were mostly moms with older children (since the ones with littler kids were either napping, nursing or both.  Therefore, if you still have little ones, I'll have to get back to you later with "A Mom's 12 Days of Christmas - Part Deux."

As it stands, the resulting jingle seems to encompass most of what a semi-typical mom with older children, especially boys, can relate to during this season of hurry scurry hoopla.

Note:  As some of you are already privy to [unfortunately for you], I've performed this particular piece in person, and, it really is kind of funny when paired with props and sung in my most endearing Fran Drescher-esque voice.  So, without further ado...

A Mom's 12 Days of Christmas
[In the interest of time, let's pretend we're on Day 12!]
ahem... la la la la...me me me me...

On the 12th day of Christmas my children gave to me...

12 Channel Changers
11 Loads of Laundry
10 Yards of Football
9 Months of Weight Gain
ATE All My Chocolate
7 Swanson Dinners
6 Smelly Gym Socks
FORE! Rounds of Golf
3 French Fries
2 Dirty Plates
and an empty can of Sam's Choice Root Beeeeeeer.

Thank you.  Thank you very much.  Don't forget to tip your waiter.

Merry Christmas!

Eat your heart out, Susan Boyle. ;)  Hehehe.


  1. Hi there I am one of many single moms and I find your site very interesting. I hope I have much time each day to drop by and check your site for recent post. By the way thank you for sharing this.


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